ashnistrike (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ashnistrike) wrote2006-04-21 04:32 pm
ashnistrike) wrote2006-04-21 04:32 pm
Trial of the darlings
The first scene of the novel, as written, has a little action, but is mostly one of my main characters talking about her life. Every bit of writing advice I've ever seen says not to do this.
I have rewritten the first scene entirely, replacing it with action/dialogue in which the character meets one of the other characters. This is, by every piece of writing advice I've ever seen, a much stronger beginning.
I like version 1 better. Not only that, but I think version 1 just might be better. I think it drops you in the deep end of an alien worldview, and makes you identify with the alien in a way that anything outside of her head wouldn't. In the next scene, where the humans declare war on the first character's planet, I think that the reader of version 1 is much more likely to feel conflicted between the two sides. And I think that some things that you can only see in a monologue (because she would never say them to anybody, and they don't come up naturally anywhere else early in the book), bring out some important symmetries and themes later on.
Half of my betas liked version 1; half got drawn in more by other characters' scenes. I've seen books where a little bit of autobiography worked very well, and where an interesting first person voice more than made up for doing what you're not supposed to do. I've seen books where a beginning monologue killed all my desire to read further. And I have no frigging clue which this is.
Update: Okay, I managed to integrate them. A little action, followed by the absolutely crucial part of the original scene, followed by the dialogue. I am content. I think.
I have rewritten the first scene entirely, replacing it with action/dialogue in which the character meets one of the other characters. This is, by every piece of writing advice I've ever seen, a much stronger beginning.
I like version 1 better. Not only that, but I think version 1 just might be better. I think it drops you in the deep end of an alien worldview, and makes you identify with the alien in a way that anything outside of her head wouldn't. In the next scene, where the humans declare war on the first character's planet, I think that the reader of version 1 is much more likely to feel conflicted between the two sides. And I think that some things that you can only see in a monologue (because she would never say them to anybody, and they don't come up naturally anywhere else early in the book), bring out some important symmetries and themes later on.
Half of my betas liked version 1; half got drawn in more by other characters' scenes. I've seen books where a little bit of autobiography worked very well, and where an interesting first person voice more than made up for doing what you're not supposed to do. I've seen books where a beginning monologue killed all my desire to read further. And I have no frigging clue which this is.
Update: Okay, I managed to integrate them. A little action, followed by the absolutely crucial part of the original scene, followed by the dialogue. I am content. I think.